


Lady Hamilton's Secret

by SzonKlin



Series: Family Secrets [2]
Category: The Halcyon (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 07:32:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15092069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SzonKlin/pseuds/SzonKlin
Summary: A mother always knowsCan be read as a separate fic, but it makes most sense if you read it as part of the Family Secrets series





	Lady Hamilton's Secret

Everyone talked about how the end of the war was bringing change. Life was getting easier, more reliable. Everyone was making long term plans now that they didn’t have to consider the possibility of a bomb destroying them.

And everyone was asking Toby about his plans as well. He managed to evade such questions by claiming that he was focusing on his brother’s upcoming wedding, and when that was over, by saying he needed a little rest after five years of almost completely vacationless work at the War Office.

But just when he finally figured out which answers would get him out of such a questioning the quickest, there was a new hardship they had to face, maybe the hardest ever.

The Halcyon hosted wedding receptions every other week that ranged from the glamorous celebration of Freddie and Emma to the festive party of Betsey and Sonny. And it wasn’t just the Halcyon. Couples from different classes, nations, ages, or races were getting married all over London and the more it seemed like anyone could marry but them, the more Toby and Adil suffered from not being able to even admit their love outside of a painfully small circle of friends.

Which is why one morning in May Toby was knocking on his mother’s door.

“Come in” Lady Priscilla called. She smiled when she saw who it was. “So glad you are here darling. Which broch do you think goes better with this dress?”

Toby watched fondly as Lady Hamilton held up first one then another broch to her dress. He never cared much for women’s fashion, but the times when his mother would march in his room to ask for advice on her clothing and to talk about her life were the times he felt closest to her.

“Mother, remember that French chap from the war office, Pierre Dumont?”

“Yes of course. There was always something very foreign about the way he dressed, and he was very peculiar about his dinner. Chef Robbie was always in quite a state whenever he had to prepare dinner for him”

“Yes, well. After the liberation of Paris, he returned there, and he got a position as head of the combinatorics department in the École Polytechnique.”

“You must realize that I haven’t the slightest idea as to what that might mean”

“Mother” Toby groaned. Just as he had no understanding of women’s fashion, Lady Hamilton couldn’t grasp her son’s favourite subject either. But this wasn’t the time to explain his research again. “Anyway, he had always shown much interest in my work at Oxford and he always felt sorry that I abandoned it when I joined the war office. And he recently wrote me telling me how my subject would fit into his program and he is inviting me to continue my research there.”

“You want to move to France?” Lady Hamilton paled at the thought.

“It would be a chance to get my doctorate.”

“But couldn’t you do that at Oxford?”

“Probably. But it would be strange to go back there, as if nothing has changed.”

“Cambridge then. Or any other school in Britain.”

“But I wasn’t specifically invited to any other school in Britain” Toby argued. But it was like he fought with a hand tied behind his back. He couldn’t tell his mother the real reason he wanted to go to France.

A few times over the past six years, Toby and Adil visited some of London’s gay bars. It wasn’t necessarily the sort of thing they would have enjoyed, but it was nice to be able to be together outside of Adil’s flat or Toby’s room. It also gave them the chance to talk with some people who shared their struggles. One of these men was a French gentleman, André, who came to England looking for refuge but suffered greatly from what he called “the archaic laws of a nation living in the past” and explained to anyone who was willing to listen how in France there were no laws against homosexual people.

After they met André, Toby and Adil spent countless hours reading and dreaming about living in a country where their love wasn’t illegal. But they also learnt about the struggles of gay people in countries occupied by the Germans and they agreed to be content with what they had. They never thought it could become a reality for them and after a few months they put that dream aside. But when Pierre wrote Toby about the research opportunity, they returned to their dream with renewed energy.

Their plan was that Toby would go there first and after a few weeks Adil would quietly resign, citing family reasons, and when nobody was watching, he would join Toby in France. They knew that the lives of gay people weren’t completely carefree in Paris either, but it would have been a vast improvement on what they had now.

Considering all that it was no surprise that Toby had no patience to fight his mother on this. Even though now more than ever it was crucial that he didn’t tell her the truth. The last thing he and Adil needed was to be found out and separated when they were so close to having a chance at a better life together.

Lady Priscilla noticed her son’s dark look and, assuming it was hurt pride, decided to change tactic.

“I didn’t mean to offend you darling. I just don’t like the idea of you being so far from us, alone in a foreign country.”

“Are you proposing to come with me?” The idea was so ridiculous that it didn’t even scare Toby.

“No, I think I had my share of French people.”

Toby had his suspicions that something secretive happened between his mother and D’Abberville, fuelled by such comments, but the subject was too dangerous, even after all these years so he never asked, and she never told. However much she wanted to be honest with her sons, she knew she couldn’t admit to having killed a man and expect them to understand unless she could tell them why she did it. And considering that Toby still didn’t tell her about his love life, she wasn’t ready to let him know what she suspected.

But now the alternative was that her son would move to a foreign country without either of them telling the truth, she had to think of something.

“Well, then. I can hardly take Freddie. But I dare say I’ll be fine. And if I can no longer take it, I’ll only be a boat ride away.”

“Yes, I know. But I’m your mother. I’ll always worry about you when you are so far away from me.”

Toby hugged Lady Hamilton and for a few moments they quietly appreciated this rare moment of closeness between them. The urge to maintain this intimacy gave Lady Priscilla an idea. She might not have wanted to force her son to be truthful, but she could give him a push, by hinting that she knew about and wasn’t opposed to his relationship.

“I’ll tell you what. I can see that you want to be away from here and I know I can’t stop you. But I will insist that you take someone with you. Someone to look after you. Someone to make sure that you have clean clothes to wear and proper food to eat.”

“I’m sure I couldn’t bear the thought of taking Mrs. Hobbs away from you” Toby protests, anxious to leave the conversation. “And I am quite capable of looking after myself”

Lady Hamilton didn’t even dignify that with a verbal answer, she just glared at Toby’s crooked tie pointedly.

“I wasn’t thinking of Mrs. Hobbs. Even if you act this petulantly, you are no longer a child in need of a nanny. You are a man. And you need a valet.”

Toby opened his mouth to interrupt, but Lady Hamilton just waved him off.

“I know what you are going to say. And I wouldn’t submit a properly trained valet to have to contend with someone as disorganized as yourself. However, there is another option. I assume from the amount of time you spend in the bar, that you know the head barman, Mr. Joshi. I think I’ve heard someone mention that he wanted to become a valet. I will only allow you to France if you take him with you.”

Toby was struck dumb by his mother’s words. He remembered that they agreed that no one should know that Adil was going to live with Toby, but he suddenly couldn’t remember why that was important or if having this setup would be better than what they came up with. Finally, the years of hiding and weeks of planning won, and he started to object.

“Mother, I’m going to be a researcher. I won’t have the need or the money for a valet”

“But I have the need to know you are looked after. And I will pay his wages. Yes, the more I think about it, the better I like the idea of having someone familiar look after you. I’ll make sure to offer him more than the strictly necessary money, I don’t want him getting a better offer and leave you in a lurch. Now move along, I have a hotel to attend to.”

Toby didn’t even realize his mother has finished preparing and numbly went along as she ushered him out of her room. He knew there was no point in arguing anyway. He wouldn’t know what to think till he talked it all out with Adil. But deep in his heart, hope began to rise. Maybe his mother wasn’t as clueless as he thought. And maybe she wasn’t as strict as she used to be.

After all, she never once brought up the possibility of a French daughter-in-law.

***

 

It seemed that everyone from the Halcyon was at the train station to see Mr. Hamilton and Mr. Joshi off.

In the commotion to make sure that everything was properly packed and labelled, that no good-bye gift was forgotten, and no well-wishes left unsaid, none really noticed Lady Hamilton pulling Mr. Joshi aside.

“Make sure he writes to me sometimes” she begged. “And if he needs anything, don’t hesitate to let me know, even if that means going behind his back. He can be stubborn and needlessly proud. And remind him to visit me sometimes. And thank you for being there with him. Thank you for making sure that he is cared for, Mister… – Adil.” She suddenly hugged him and whispered into his ear “thank you for being there to love him.”

**Author's Note:**

> Lady H just keeps sneaking up on me. I didn't like her at first but there is just something about her that keeps bugging me. The way she is portrayed as a villain but in some scenes she shows to have a soft side, one that just wants to be loved but after a probably very strict childhood, a miserable marriage to an unfaithful man and then when she was finally happy with someone it all turned out to be just an act. And I think she deserves some love after all that.
> 
> Also I didn't do much research into French universities. I just know that in France homosexuality was decriminalized in 1791 when they created a brand new penal code and simply didn't put in any laws against it. So I just went on google and looked up the first uni in Paris that could have had a Maths department prior to the 90s
> 
> Would you be interested in more stories about how Toby and Adil navigate the changing legal landscape of the 20th century Europe? Let me know in the comments or find me at szonklin.tumblr.com


End file.
